Conditional behaviour of Red types
Red types need to feel important to themselves. They find an easy way to fill this need by going after goals and challenges. Red types are so afraid to not feel important that they constantly set themselves challenges, all day long. The conditional behaviour that flows from this worry is the behaviour of finding solutions… fast, and constantly. By going after the fastest solution in this way, Red types often discover that they have missed the best solution. This just proves to them that they aren’t good enough, that they aren’t important!
Example: During a training session, a Red participant shared that she is unable to manage a person on her team. For the next fifteen minutes, she shared all the things she tried without success. While she is talking, her body is tense and we feel her distress. The further she goes into her list of failures, the more tense she gets. The trainer asks: “What does your boss think of all of this?” She stops for a moment, surprised: “I have no idea!” And she relaxes all at once and smiles. The trainer asks her: “What just happened for you?” She replies: “Well, I just found a solution!”
Red types yoyo constantly between tension and relaxation. Each time they face a problem, it creates tension, and every solution provides relaxation. Red types generally carry their tension in their jaws, like they are chewing gum, and in their shoulders, which are often tight and painful.
Solution: Once again, we are going to work on the proof, in order to reduce tension.
We suggest to Red types that they let a little problem sit without a solution for 5 minutes. We used to suggest an hour, but Red types made it clear that that was not possible, because it was too long. Letting a problem sit for 5 minutes doesn’t force them to question their importance for too long. It’s manageable. And it leads to solutions that are a little more thought-out, more lasting, and this helps Red types feel important to themselves!